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“How’s Business Going?”: The Truth, The Joker, and What I Learned About Myself

Writer: Kathryn Van Der SteegeKathryn Van Der Steege

I was taking to a mentor and good friend and he asked “How is business going”


What I SHOULD have said was:

My product based start-up has made slow yet consistent growth which is relative across the industry where conversion rates are down year on year.  I have learnt a new skill which turns out I’m good at - Media Buying.


I purposefully paused growing my coaching business this year, in order to focus on my family demands as my husband navigated cancer diagnosis, surgery and intense recovery.  I serviced my existing clients and really honed in on WHO I serve and HOW I serve them powerfully, by continuing to master my coaching skills.


Overall it has been an expansive year being both incredibly challenging and rewarding.


What I ACTUALLY said was:

"I trained for 12 years to be a coach and then I did this crazy arse thing and went on a wild diversion with the ecom biz. "


Here lies a default pattern I often play.  Stepping into the Joker Archetype.


Archetype work can help us to recognise the unconscious patterns that we run.  Some archetypes may be effective however many are ineffective.


You might a recognise a few of these in your self of those your work with:

  • Joker: makes jokes or tries to be funny to fulfil a need to be liked or avoid a more serious conversation and or taking responsibility.

  • Victim: everything is always happening to them and everyone else’s fault

  • Martyr:  self sacrificing and does everything for everyone else so they can then say how much they do for everyone else and how much they contribute.

  • Hero: sweeps in to save the day.


There are more archetypes however I am sure you get the idea.


So what was I trying to avoid when I stepped into the Joker Archetype in this conversation?


💚 The reality that I am not where I thought I would be in either business by this point.

💚 That I have been trying to run not 1 but 2 businesses as a single person and to match the level of vision I have I need to get more focused + bring on team and haven’t done that yet.

💚 That I am in fact a phenomenal coach who can bring my clients to the deepest of transformational insights and yet I am robbing the people who need this service by not putting coaching business as the top priority.


As I reflect on my default patterns and the realities I’ve been avoiding, I’m reminded of the power of awareness. Recognising these archetypes is the first step toward transforming them.


The truth? I’m proud of my journey this year. The challenges, the growth, and the deep clarity about where I want to go in 2025.


💚 And the fact that my husband is now caner free and my girls are thriving 💚 !


So here’s to owning our stories, embracing growth, and building our next chapters with intention. What archetype are you ready to transform in your life or work?


P.S The Joker in me had to use this photo 😂

 
 
 

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